Go to What I SHOULD Have Said... main page

Here is one story retold, albeit with a pithier ending:

From The Goddamn Batman:

Oops, worng section.

What happened: So I was leaving the through the main doors at my college & heading towards the smoking section, which was about 100 feet away. About 30 feet out the door, I lit up a smoke. I walked passes some snooty chick, and she said, "Uhhh, smoking section's over there."

What I said: Nothing.

What I SHOULD have said: Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't know this was the bitching section!

on the stairs

L'esprit d'escalier

The French call it l'esprit d'escalier, "the wit of the staircase," those biting ripostes that are thought of just seconds too late, on the way out of the room-or even, to tell the truth, days later. It's happened to you: you've suddenly thought of just what would put your foe in his or her place, but past the time when the arrow could sting its victim. You've stewed in your own juice ever since, and the chance for singeing repartee is gone forever.

Or is it?

Dorothy Parker or Oscar Wilde may have had the rapier wit to tweak their tormentors on the spot, but for the rest of us, we offer the Internet's only L'esprit d'escalier web site!