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Here is one story retold, albeit with a pithier ending:

From Brad:

Meeting Lady Di

What happened: In 1983 I took a wheelchair-using friend to Parliament Hill in Ottawa to wait for the arrival of Prince Charles and Lady Diana, who were making a state visit to Canada. Being as I was with a wheelchair user, we got priority seating at the front of the public area that Chuck and Di would be walking along. They appeared, and to my shock and amazement, Di headed straight towards me. She stopped, and I was too stunned to even rise from the lawn chair I'd brought. She leaned down, smiled, and said, "You must be hot with this bright sun and all that lovely curly hair."

What I said: "Er... uh... ack... heh... yes."

What I SHOULD have said: "You bet I am, Diana. Why don't you dump that goof with the big ears and we'll go find a nice place to cool off."

on the stairs

L'esprit d'escalier

The French call it l'esprit d'escalier, "the wit of the staircase," those biting ripostes that are thought of just seconds too late, on the way out of the room-or even, to tell the truth, days later. It's happened to you: you've suddenly thought of just what would put your foe in his or her place, but past the time when the arrow could sting its victim. You've stewed in your own juice ever since, and the chance for singeing repartee is gone forever.

Or is it?

Dorothy Parker or Oscar Wilde may have had the rapier wit to tweak their tormentors on the spot, but for the rest of us, we offer the Internet's only L'esprit d'escalier web site!