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Here is one story retold, albeit with a pithier ending:

From Fee fee:

It's for you

What happened: This was years ago in school. We wern't allowed to wear jewellery. Everyone tried to sneak a little bit on - just the way kids want to appear clever etc.. Most of the teachers didn't care, but some of them took it really seriously. Standing in line one day, a particular old bat jetted over, and shouted: "RING!"

What I said: Took it off mumbling, and handed it over.

What I SHOULD have said: "HELLO?!"

on the stairs

L'esprit d'escalier

The French call it l'esprit d'escalier, "the wit of the staircase," those biting ripostes that are thought of just seconds too late, on the way out of the room-or even, to tell the truth, days later. It's happened to you: you've suddenly thought of just what would put your foe in his or her place, but past the time when the arrow could sting its victim. You've stewed in your own juice ever since, and the chance for singeing repartee is gone forever.

Or is it?

Dorothy Parker or Oscar Wilde may have had the rapier wit to tweak their tormentors on the spot, but for the rest of us, we offer the Internet's only L'esprit d'escalier web site!