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Here is one story retold, albeit with a pithier ending:
What happened: I work in a body shop that does state inspections. On the last day of the month, at 4:45 pm, a customer came in and asked if he could have a state inspection performed. I informed him that we were booked up. He demanded to see the owner, he wasn't in, he demanded (rudely now) to talk to the tech, he was busy. He kept yelling and yelling, cussing etc. and getting angrier by the minute.
What I said: I apologized profusely and told him I was sorry we couldn't assist him.
What I SHOULD have said: Would you like to speak to the office manager? That would be me, the person getting yelled at for no reason. If you had bothered to not wait till the last minute you could have saved yourself some $ on your blood pressure pills and had the inspection done on time. Customers like you, we don't need
The French call it l'esprit d'escalier, "the wit of the staircase," those biting ripostes that are thought of just seconds too late, on the way out of the room-or even, to tell the truth, days later. It's happened to you: you've suddenly thought of just what would put your foe in his or her place, but past the time when the arrow could sting its victim. You've stewed in your own juice ever since, and the chance for singeing repartee is gone forever.
Or is it?
Dorothy Parker or Oscar Wilde may have had the rapier wit to tweak their tormentors on the spot, but for the rest of us, we offer the Internet's only L'esprit d'escalier web site!