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Here is one story retold, albeit with a pithier ending:

From Smartass kid:

The little train that DID!

What happened: My teacher coming into the classroom a little too quickly, pushing the door ahead of him which bounced right back and hit him hard on the shoulder. He glared at the door, very annoyed.

What I said: Stupid door!

What I SHOULD have said: No, that was it. For probably the only time in my life I DID say what I should have said. I was 10 and have never managed a more perfectly timed response to an event. The teacher snapped round and suddenly exploded in laughter. I was 10....sigh

on the stairs

L'esprit d'escalier

The French call it l'esprit d'escalier, "the wit of the staircase," those biting ripostes that are thought of just seconds too late, on the way out of the room-or even, to tell the truth, days later. It's happened to you: you've suddenly thought of just what would put your foe in his or her place, but past the time when the arrow could sting its victim. You've stewed in your own juice ever since, and the chance for singeing repartee is gone forever.

Or is it?

Dorothy Parker or Oscar Wilde may have had the rapier wit to tweak their tormentors on the spot, but for the rest of us, we offer the Internet's only L'esprit d'escalier web site!