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Here is one story retold, albeit with a pithier ending:

From FreezingMormon:

Are you yelling at me?

What happened: It was sophmore yearin highschool and some Stupid freshman decided he would show off to his little group off friends and be all bad and tell my group of friends to move out of the way, so he could get past, even though their was plenty of room.

What I said: You can go around. and when he didn't move. Are you to fat or to stupid to do that?

What I SHOULD have said: Go around you stupid freshman and next time you want to try and act all bad.. don't. cause there are a number of upper classmen that don't even need a reason to beat up freshmen, so it's unwise to give them a reason cause they might just go out of their way to kick your ass.

on the stairs

L'esprit d'escalier

The French call it l'esprit d'escalier, "the wit of the staircase," those biting ripostes that are thought of just seconds too late, on the way out of the room-or even, to tell the truth, days later. It's happened to you: you've suddenly thought of just what would put your foe in his or her place, but past the time when the arrow could sting its victim. You've stewed in your own juice ever since, and the chance for singeing repartee is gone forever.

Or is it?

Dorothy Parker or Oscar Wilde may have had the rapier wit to tweak their tormentors on the spot, but for the rest of us, we offer the Internet's only L'esprit d'escalier web site!