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Here is one story retold, albeit with a pithier ending:

From The Window was ALREADY BROKEN!:

Broken Window

What happened: I went to my Friends house one night, her having a golf course behind her house only led us to entertain ourselves. The house next door had been vancant for a few months now, and the back yard was just FULL of golf balls. SO, we jumped the fence into the house's backyard.. And ... collected (yeah that sounds good) golfballs. Three windows had already been broken from golfers, and it didnt seem to hurt if we threw a few at the already broken windows, which then broke even more. Seven golf balls total. not including rocks and sticks, and then the hell razing neighbor from the other side came to the fence. after questioning us and yelling, telling us we where in serious trouble, and would be sent to jail, she decided to prance over to my friends house to "report the Vandilisum". We ran back to her house, and stood by the door to her this lady's story to my friends mom.what she told was " i was gardening and i heard a TERRIBLE crash! and i decided to walk over, and as terrified as i was! i saw three broken windows, that havent been broken before!!" When then my friends mom spoke up "we have record from the county of the broken windows, dear"

What I said: *laughed loudly then looked inocent* so we wont get in any trouble?

What I SHOULD have said: HAHA BITCH! *then looks inocent* no police call right?

on the stairs

L'esprit d'escalier

The French call it l'esprit d'escalier, "the wit of the staircase," those biting ripostes that are thought of just seconds too late, on the way out of the room-or even, to tell the truth, days later. It's happened to you: you've suddenly thought of just what would put your foe in his or her place, but past the time when the arrow could sting its victim. You've stewed in your own juice ever since, and the chance for singeing repartee is gone forever.

Or is it?

Dorothy Parker or Oscar Wilde may have had the rapier wit to tweak their tormentors on the spot, but for the rest of us, we offer the Internet's only L'esprit d'escalier web site!