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Here is one story retold, albeit with a pithier ending:
From drama girl!:
What happened: (before I type this I wish for you to know that I try my hardest to be nice...)
We had our AS drama exam yesterday. Everyone was in a big hoo-ha because it is 40% of our over all mark. Of course I was the calmest, because I've been in this position before. The show went OK, nobody forgot their lines at all. Sadly my friend, which I shall call 'L' is not the greatest actress, and after the show she said "how was I, I mean...honestly?"
What I said: "oh my God, you were amazing" *big hug*
What I SHOULD have said: "YOU SUCK, DON'T EVER ACT AGAIN MY DARLING!" *big hug*
The French call it l'esprit d'escalier, "the wit of the staircase," those biting ripostes that are thought of just seconds too late, on the way out of the room-or even, to tell the truth, days later. It's happened to you: you've suddenly thought of just what would put your foe in his or her place, but past the time when the arrow could sting its victim. You've stewed in your own juice ever since, and the chance for singeing repartee is gone forever.
Or is it?
Dorothy Parker or Oscar Wilde may have had the rapier wit to tweak their tormentors on the spot, but for the rest of us, we offer the Internet's only L'esprit d'escalier web site!