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Here is one story retold, albeit with a pithier ending:

From syn:

Damn cops

What happened: I was traveling along a two-lane divided highway at 3 o'clock in the morning when i was pulled over for speeding. There was no one else on the highway. I was in the left lane and pulled over on the left shoulder. The office comes up the to passenger side window and says "why have you stopped in the middle of the road?" I said "I'm not in the middle of the road," he said "you see that yellow line? You are stopped right on it and look where I am standing." Sure enough, he was standing in the left lane of the highway. He said "pull over to the right side of the road and I will pull behind you." I obliged, he followed, got out of his car and approached my driver side window....

What I said: Nothing at all

What I SHOULD have said: Look where you're standing now, dumbass!

on the stairs

L'esprit d'escalier

The French call it l'esprit d'escalier, "the wit of the staircase," those biting ripostes that are thought of just seconds too late, on the way out of the room-or even, to tell the truth, days later. It's happened to you: you've suddenly thought of just what would put your foe in his or her place, but past the time when the arrow could sting its victim. You've stewed in your own juice ever since, and the chance for singeing repartee is gone forever.

Or is it?

Dorothy Parker or Oscar Wilde may have had the rapier wit to tweak their tormentors on the spot, but for the rest of us, we offer the Internet's only L'esprit d'escalier web site!